Jurassic Park: What if Dennis Nedry was already rich online?
Nedry: “Spare no expense? Please. My eBay side hustle just paid for a new Jeep.”
In the movie, Dennis shuts down Jurassic Park’s security system to smuggle dino DNA for cash.
That one move lets the T-Rex out, the raptors roam free, and chaos begins.
But what if he didn’t need the money?
What if Nedry was already making bank online?
He’s flipping Beanie Babies on eBay.
Running a “Work From Home” Geocities site.
Day-trading AOL stock like a king.
The fences? Stay on.
The T-Rex? Still behind 10,000 volts.
The lawyer? Safe on his toilet.
The tour goes smoothly.
Dinosaurs look bored.
Jeff Goldblum yawns.
The climax isn’t a fight for survival.
It’s Nedry refreshing his PayPal account.
The dinosaurs? Trapped.
The humans? Fine.
The movie? A zoo documentary.
Sometimes the deadliest predator isn’t greed…
It’s dot-com success.
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